HELP (NOT) WANTED
Let’s say you have a friend or family member who has really bad spending habits. Almost every month they run out of money before they run out of bills, and they come and ask you (or someone else you know,) for money.
They say they need it for gas for their car, but you know their car is broken down and not driving, so you question it. Then they say it’s actually for groceries. For their kids. They say, “I’ll just eat potato chips for the next couple of weeks, but I really want my kids to be able to eat something more than that.”
You REALLY want to help them, but past experience tells you if you give them money they are probably NOT going to spend it wisely - like to get their car fixed or pay a bill - and definitely not for groceries for their kids. You gently let them know you are unable to give them money, but ask them if you can help them create a budget. They become enraged and tell you you’re a judgmental, arrogant jerk who thinks you’re better than everyone and you don’t really love them because if you did you would want them to be able to feed their kids! You offer them a gift card to the grocery store, but they just hang up on you.
A bit of a dramatic example… but not really.
Experiences like this are really difficult, and they can be REALLY frustrating! Again, any time someone rubs me the wrong way like this, I have to ask myself, (and God!) “How am I like this? Clearly this is a “sandpaper person” in my life, so what part of me is needing to be softened?”
The hard truth is this is oftentimes exactly how I am to God.
I ask Him to help me, but then I’m angry He’s not helping me the way I want Him to. When things don’t turn out the way I think they should and/or He doesn’t answer my prayers in the way I want.
But, God’s ways are higher than our ways… (Isaiah 55:9 ) He sees the BIG picture, and our view is limited. Very, very limited.
Maybe that car crash took that person’s life, but saved them from years of suffering with a painful disease. We don’t know. But God does.
Maybe not getting that job is opening the door for a different opportunity, more in alignment with your natural gifts and talents and His will for your life.
Maybe not having a baby at this time is allowing the opportunity to learn the faith and patience you will need as a parent.
The truth is, most of the time we don’t really want help... we just want things to go our way and/or all our problems FIXED for us!
I just want to BE patient, I don’t want more red lights and obnoxious people and challenging computer issues so I can learn, earn, or DEVELOP patience! *laughing*
We just want more money so we don’t have to worry about bills… we don’t want to go through the pain of budgeting and sacrificing and saving and NOT getting what we want RIGHT NOW.
We want to be able to eat whatever we want whenever we want... we don’t want to limit and discipline ourselves to eat food that is healthy and do the hard work of exercising more frequently to keep our body in shape.
We want the joy of children and we just want them to do what we say (and be more like us!) but we REALLY don’t want to have hard conversations with them, teaching them God’s word, (especially when it’s so unpopular and goes against what THEY think!) setting healthy boundaries and restrictions for them, and enduring the pain and heartache involved in working through issues with them. (Proverbs 22:6, Proverbs 13:24, Proverbs 23:13)
We just want our loved one healed.
We just want our relationships restored.
We just want... our lives to be better! To be EASIER!
But, this isn’t what Jesus told us. He said we would need to pick up our cross DAILY and follow Him. (Luke 9:23) He said in this world we WOULD have trouble. But He also said to fear not because He has overcome the world, (John 16:33) and He will be with us forever. (Matthew 28:20)
As always, this comes back to relationship with Him. Do we TRUST Him? (Matthew 14:31) Do we BELIEVE that He is GOOD. (Psalm 34:8) Do we KNOW that He ALWAYS has our BEST in mind?? (Jeremiah 29:11) Do we HEAR His voice and listen to Him? (John 10:5)
If we pray in these circumstances, He will answer us - though maybe not in the ways we want or expect! - but when we truly hear and obey Him, we will have His peace. This doesn’t mean our situation will instantly change… the thief on the cross next to Jesus still died that day… (Luke 23:39-43) but we WILL have His peace, knowing we are doing the right thing. (Isaiah 26:3)
So, when we ask Him for help, do we REALLY want it… or not?
SCRIPTURES
Isaiah 55:9 ~ As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. (NIV)
Proverbs 22:6 ~ Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. (NKJV)
Proverbs 13:24 ~ The one who spares his rod hates his child, but the one who loves his child is diligent in disciplining him. (NET)
Proverbs 23:13 ~ Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with the rod, they will not die. (NIV)
Luke 9:23 ~ And he (Jesus) said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” (ESV)
John 16:33 ~ I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.] (AMPC)
Matthew 28:20 ~ Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age. (NLT)
Matthew 14:31 ~ Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” (NIV)
Psalm 34:8 ~ Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! (ESV)
Jeremiah 29:11 ~ For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for prosperity and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. (NASB)
John 10:5 ~ They will never follow a stranger, but will run away from him, because they do not recognize the stranger’s voice.” (NET)
Luke 23:39-43 ~ One of the criminals hanging beside him scoffed, “So you’re the Messiah, are you? Prove it by saving yourself—and us, too, while you’re at it!” But the other criminal protested, “Don’t you fear God even when you have been sentenced to die? We deserve to die for our crimes, but this man hasn’t done anything wrong.” Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your Kingdom.” And Jesus replied, “I assure you, today you will be with me in paradise.” (NLT)
Isaiah 26:3 ~ You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You. (NKJV)